Heartbreaks

heartbreaks are never easy.

Love. It is a chemical. It is an emotion. It is what drive people to crazy stupid things. No one escapes it and yet people all around the world yearn for it like water in a desert. Can I find love? Can it stay? Will it hurt? Am I good enough for it?

In this cold harsh city we call Singapore, thousands of hearts are being broken everyday, relationships end like a movie and after all that we are left with pieces, broken fragments of our past. The memories can't seem to go away, you want to forget but you also want to hold on. We cry, we shout, we drown ourselves in torrents of booze but in the morning we wake to find that life has go on without us.

You go to school, to work, you sit down and all you can think about is what went wrong. I mean, you were perfect for each other, you even made each other a promise to never leave, to never ever let go. It all seem so unreal, maybe it was all just a bad bad dream? You pick up the phone, yes, it was all a bad dream, we would never leave each other, we made a promise. "Babe, I love you, come back to me please!" "I'm sorry.... who's this?" ".........."

Love. You can't find it. It won't stay. It hurts. You are never good enough for it. The world seems so dull, all you can see is black and white. You swear with all your heart, you will never fall in love again. Never.

Days, weeks, months pass. You sit in your apartment, cigarettes to your left, alcohol to your right. Has it been 2 months since you left your house? You look at your phone, 63 missed calls. Fuck it. You throw it in the bin and back to sleep.

A year has pass now. Alcohol and cigarettes can't numb the pain anymore, you want to jump but you'r too scared, you want to cut but it's too painful. You start to cry, to the piont your eyes are too tired to produce tears. You start to laugh, after all it's the only thing you can do.

You go to school, to work, you sit down and all you can think about is that handsome guy infront, or perhaps that cute boy behind, oh, maybe that hunky lecturer! You open your heart and legs to everyone and anyone. People start calling you a slut but you don't care. You just want to find love again, WHAT'S FUCKING WRONG WITH FINDING LOVE?

Finally! A guy that treats you like a princess! You did it, you found love again.

3 months later, you'r on the ground again, eyes swollen, nose bleeding. You tell him you'r sorry but all he does is give you another slap and tell you to just shut the fuck up. You crawl your way to the kitchen to bring him his food, how can you leave him, who's gonna kiss you, who's gonna hug you? You tell yourself maybe it's just one of his bad days and crawl slowly to him.

The wind is always cold up on the rooftop, you never realize the city was so beautiful. Tears roll down your cheeks, you look down from the 10th floor, surprisingly fear did'nt overcome you this time. You smile, you tell yourself it's going to be over soon. You jump.

She was wrong, all she had to do was move on. To me, love always come, love CAN stay, love only hurts if you stop trying and EVERYONE is good enough for love. I know it's hard but this is what happens if you can't let go. So many people now just seems to be stuck in the past, they try ways and means to find love when all they had to do is to just look around, stop finding love in all the wrong places.

Help me share this to all the broken-hearted, let them know that no matter what they still have friends. Share this to the people who swear they will never love again. Share this to the people who are so desperate to find love that anybody will do. Share this so that they won't make the mistake of giving up. You are reading Community*. Stay tuned.